Sam Allman
Submitted by webadmin on December 15, 2009 - 9:25pm
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The Corner Office:
Comments from Colleagues
Guest Columnist
Sam Allman, President
Allman Consulting
www.AllmanConsulting.com
Become a People Builder
What kind of leader produces winners among his or her followers? Rick Pitino once said, "I learned a long time ago as a coach that you can expect great things from people who feel good about themselves. They can push themselves. They can set long-term goals. They have dreams that every one expects to be fulfilled. People with high self-esteem are risk takers, but more important, they are achievers."
When you believe in people, they rise to greatness. One of the greatest challenges a leader faces: helping people believe in themselves! Sam Walton said, "Outstanding leaders go out of their way to boost the self-esteem of their personnel. If people believe in themselves, it's amazing what they can accomplish."
"People who have self-confidence develop the creativity to dream, the boldness to venture into the unknown and pursue their dreams, and the courage and persuasiveness to summon help along the way."
So, what kind of leader on the job and perhaps as a parent are you? Do you build people? Or tear them down?
People builders are easy to spot. People always crowd around them. Their charisma makes them people-magnets. We all know people who attract people. They have lots of friends and followers. My best friend in high school, Larry Fryer, was a people-magnet. He was senior class president and king of the senior prom. He wasn't the typical high school socialite. He never put himself above anyone else. He followed the philosophy of Mother Theresa, "Let no one ever come to you without leaving better and happier."
That's what makes people-magnets. It's the worth and self-esteem that people feel when in the presence of these people-magnets that attract them to them.
How do they do it? People-magnets love people. The word love in Anglo-Saxon means to look for the good. They build people by looking at, and recognizing what's good about them and what they do. That's why great sales managers have teeth marks on their tongues. Instead criticizing, they focus on their constituent's strengths and manage around their weaknesses. They don't try to fix their people, because most people resist being fixed. Would you like to be "fixed"?
This doesn't mean these leaders ignore unacceptable behavior. It's just that they praise about 8 to 10 times more than they criticize. Most research has shown that in order for people to accept and grow from criticism they need 8 praises for every constructive criticism (U.S. Army).
Ken Blanchard sums it up into one sentence, "Catch people doing things right." Have you ever done something noteworthy, but no one recognized the accomplishment? How did it make you feel? Probably like the guy who wets his pants in a dark blue suit. It gives him a nice warm feeling, but no one notices.
Management guru Ken Blanchard sums it up in one sentence, "Catch people doing things right." He further adds, "Don't wait until people do things exactly right before you praise them."
We all crave recognition. If you don't think this is so, just call a friend, any friend, and when they answer, say, "Congratulations" and hang up. I guarantee that they will say to themselves, "It's about time someone noticed!"
It is debatable whether you can truly motivate people. But, you surely can de-motivate them by beating feelings of insecurity or battering their self-esteem.
Recognition is one of the important intrinsic motivation factors. You can use it to change behavior. Three are three steps, it's in the genes; It's in the DNA: 1) Decide what you want; 2) Notice when you get it; 3) and acknowledge the behavior.
Practice being aware of the good things your people and children do. Tie a string on your finger or put a bean in your shoe. Remind yourself to give "atta boys and atta girls" in a ratio of ten to one for every criticism. Criticism causes emotional divorce( what happens before the physical divorce). It's the killer of relationships, self esteem and motivation. They have never erected a statue to honor a critic. You'll never see a great leader or manager who is a critic either.
Become a leader who builds people. It will give you charisma and make you a people-magnet. It will also make you money: your people will be more productive.
When you believe in people, they rise to greatness. One of the greatest challenges a leader faces: helping people believe in themselves! Sam Walton said, "Outstanding leaders go out of their way to boost the self-esteem of their personnel. If people believe in themselves, it's amazing what they can accomplish."
"People who have self-confidence develop the creativity to dream, the boldness to venture into the unknown and pursue their dreams, and the courage and persuasiveness to summon help along the way."
So, what kind of leader on the job and perhaps as a parent are you? Do you build people? Or tear them down?
People builders are easy to spot. People always crowd around them. Their charisma makes them people-magnets. We all know people who attract people. They have lots of friends and followers. My best friend in high school, Larry Fryer, was a people-magnet. He was senior class president and king of the senior prom. He wasn't the typical high school socialite. He never put himself above anyone else. He followed the philosophy of Mother Theresa, "Let no one ever come to you without leaving better and happier."
That's what makes people-magnets. It's the worth and self-esteem that people feel when in the presence of these people-magnets that attract them to them.
How do they do it? People-magnets love people. The word love in Anglo-Saxon means to look for the good. They build people by looking at, and recognizing what's good about them and what they do. That's why great sales managers have teeth marks on their tongues. Instead criticizing, they focus on their constituent's strengths and manage around their weaknesses. They don't try to fix their people, because most people resist being fixed. Would you like to be "fixed"?
This doesn't mean these leaders ignore unacceptable behavior. It's just that they praise about 8 to 10 times more than they criticize. Most research has shown that in order for people to accept and grow from criticism they need 8 praises for every constructive criticism (U.S. Army).
Ken Blanchard sums it up into one sentence, "Catch people doing things right." Have you ever done something noteworthy, but no one recognized the accomplishment? How did it make you feel? Probably like the guy who wets his pants in a dark blue suit. It gives him a nice warm feeling, but no one notices.
Management guru Ken Blanchard sums it up in one sentence, "Catch people doing things right." He further adds, "Don't wait until people do things exactly right before you praise them."
We all crave recognition. If you don't think this is so, just call a friend, any friend, and when they answer, say, "Congratulations" and hang up. I guarantee that they will say to themselves, "It's about time someone noticed!"
It is debatable whether you can truly motivate people. But, you surely can de-motivate them by beating feelings of insecurity or battering their self-esteem.
Recognition is one of the important intrinsic motivation factors. You can use it to change behavior. Three are three steps, it's in the genes; It's in the DNA: 1) Decide what you want; 2) Notice when you get it; 3) and acknowledge the behavior.
Practice being aware of the good things your people and children do. Tie a string on your finger or put a bean in your shoe. Remind yourself to give "atta boys and atta girls" in a ratio of ten to one for every criticism. Criticism causes emotional divorce( what happens before the physical divorce). It's the killer of relationships, self esteem and motivation. They have never erected a statue to honor a critic. You'll never see a great leader or manager who is a critic either.
Become a leader who builds people. It will give you charisma and make you a people-magnet. It will also make you money: your people will be more productive.
